Weighing In

I haven't stepped on a scale in years. There's just not been one around and I haven't bothered. Truthfully, I was a bit frightened to as I've gained so much weight over the past few years. I know I'm not Jabba the Hut, but I'm also not Skinny McSkinnykins. I stepped on a scale the other day for the first time in years.

MOTHER FUCKER!!!

At least it didn't shout at me saying, "To be continued" or "Get off of me, fat ass!" I really had no idea how much I would weigh. No, I'm not revealing the number. Let's just say that if my IQ were that high, I'd be curing cancer and inventing rocket shoes. I can give all of the excuses I want. 2 injuries over the past 5 years led me to stop working out. Late night partying, drinking, eating. No set sleeping schedule. All valid, but lame. I've lost stamina. Hell, I get winded checking my email.

I need to do something about it, but am too lazy.  A good incentive is that I'm an uncle to be and I'd like to be able to play with my niece or nephew without saying, "Uncle Jimmy needs to rest before he dies." Of course, it could be a good behavior deterrent. "Uncle Jimmy eats because you cry".

Someone buy me a gym membership, organize my meals, have a car pick me up to take me to the gym, get me a trainer, and make me do it.

I'll be having a pizza and drinking beers while waiting.

Comments

[Stacer x]

Can someone sort this for me too? I got all out of breath and puffy just running about 4 feet to get a bus the other day :S