Jimmy's Juke Joint

Airplane Stuff

Okay, so I'm sitting here and chilling at an old friend's crib. Since Moms doesn't gots the computer at home, I jumped on theirs. Moms picks me up at the airport on Thursday afternoon and promptly gets lost on the way back to her house. Gotta love her! Anyway, plane shit! Here are some queries I have.

What happened to the hot stewardesses? No disrespect to these octogenarians that are currently flying the friendly skies, but come on! Give a brother something to look at! Seriously! They are all old and well traveled, if ya feel me! Or they're gay men. Stewardesses, excuse me, flight attendants use to have that same stigma of the hot teacher. If you hit that, you were the man! Mile high club and all. And the miles I've logged in back in the day.....hell's yeah! Guess I'll have to fly the new Hooters Air next time. Hey, I'd be doing it for the wings, bitches!

My other gripe is getting off the plane procedure. I always have a light carry on. Usually my messenger style bag. Easy to throw on and bounce. They should let people like me off first. Instead of everyone jumping up at the same time, dragging their way too big carry on bags out of the compartment above and holding up traffic! I swear it took me almost 30 minutes just to get off the frickin plane! Sheeeeesh! Next time, I'll just go all NYC on them and get up before the plane lands. Of course, they'll think I'm a terrorist or something and I'll get in lots of trouble, but I'll be the first one off!

Jacksonville, Florida. Lame capital of the South. Only 2 more days and back in the NYC. I'll do my best to have fun. At least I can see old friends and of course, moms. Saving grace. Or I'd probably strangle myself with the buckle of this Bible Belt place. Still, nice to be away and chill. Hope you kids are having fun without me. Or at least trying.

Here's wishing me a hot stewardess and early exit on my return flight.

Florida Bound!

I'm heading back to Jacksonville, Florida in about 3 hours. One of my old acting students from back in the day, Megan, is getting married on Saturday. I'll hang with Moms and a few old friends.

My date for the wedding will be an old girlfriend. And by old, I mean she's 89 yrs. old. I used to change her bed pan out and we fell in love. She'd take her teeth out and we'd....oh, uh...well...that's personal! No, seriously, my date is an old girlfriend, Dionne. We dated for almost 2 years back around when we were 20 or so. To this date, still my longest relationship. We were young and hot and crazy. Look at us over there! Jealous?

You remember Megan. I posted about her awhile back. She thinks I embarrassed her and has now rescinded her request for me to do a toast at the reception. She can't stop me! Now it's on! She wants embarrassment, she'll get it! Just kidding there, Megs. You know I gots nothing but mad love for you. But, just in case....keep the bourbon away.

I may not be able to post for a couple of days due to lack of internet access. Moms doesn't have a home computer. If I can hit an internet cafe or use a friends, then consider  yourself lucky. I know you will miss me, so I'll do what I can. Bitches.

In the meanwhile, go listen to the podcast!

CNI: Episode 28

Comic News Insider: Episode 28 is available by 9 a.m. today! Click on the link to take you directly to the website and download and enjoy! Or, as always, go to iTunes, click on "Podcasts", type in COMIC NEWS INSIDER, download...better yet...SUBSCRIBE to our podcast! It's free, bitches! Get going! Matter of fact, do me a favor. Leave comments on our web site and at the iTunes page. Just do it. You'll feel better about yourself if you do.

This episode has me drinking tons of wine. As you can see in the picture over there. I'm talking bottles of the stuff! I slur and slosh and stutter my way through it all. Drunkenly trying to review comic books and movies and TV shows. Well, not really. I only had a glass or 3! As always, if you want to know what we discussed, go download and listen! There ain't no free handouts here!

Okay, okay. Here's a teaser. Some teaser, eh? Who's the hottie? Well, she's our special guest and my current roommate, Ashley. We have a new segment called "Converting to Comicdom". I gave her 3 of my comics to read and we interviewed her and got her reviews. Some good stuff and interesting perspective from a female and first time comic book reader. That's right, brothers in geekdom. We have converted a beautiful girl into the comic book universe.

This splash page was one of her favorites from the new PAINKILLER JANE #1. Funny bit, she said the shot inspired her to go to the gym for hours today! Not that she needs it, of course. She also mentioned how she got more looks than normal today from guys because she was reading a comic book while waiting in line for an audition. It's like seeing Big Foot or a unicorn. A mirage. Some beautiful creature of myth appears before your very eyes! They do exist, people! Well, chicks that read comics do.

As per usual, Joe is there reigning the craziness in and trying to keep me on track. We all know how I likes to gab! Besides the segment with Ashley, we also talked about Wonder Woman casting rumors, my new addiction to The Godfather video game, Chefgate, GUN-FU, CYBERFORCE and we pick our weekly Top 3.

Check it. Give it a listen. Leave comments on our site and on the iTunes page as well. Oh, we finally have our little icon up on the iTunes page. Check it out. Lemme know what ya think! Enjoy!

Lindsay Lohan: Wonder Woman?

Wonder Woman is finally getting her due in the movie business. Common knowledge that one of my writing/directing deities, Joss Whedon, he of BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER, ANGEL, FIREFLY and SERENITY fame, is writing and directing the feature film. According to recent reports from Joss himself, he just turned in the script. Of course, rumors have been flying around about whom would be playing the Maiden of Might. Joss has insisted that it will indeed be a woman. And she will be wonderful. But, he refuses to even speculate. His old excuse was that he didn't have the script finished. Now he does. So, spill it, Joss! Who's on the short list? And, with a high profile role like this, actresses all over are starting to show interest.

Yeah, that's right. Lindsay Lohan. Now, don't get me wrong. I ain't hatin' on her. I just don't think she's right for the role. As, I've a feeling, most people don't. It's cute that she believes she might have a chance. Come on, Lindsay. Get over yourself. I loved MEAN GIRLS just like everyone else, but you're no Wonder Woman. Not even a Wonder Girl. And, as you can tell in the pic, she doesn't even need a Wonder Bra! Joss has insisted on an unknown,but who knows how much pressure he will get from the studios. Some of his former female stars have expressed interest as well. Eliza Dushku, "Faith" from BUFFY/ANGEL. I freakin love her, but don't see her in it either. Morena Baccarin from FIREFLY/SERENITY. Another one I adore,but she's too little. Gotta be someone statuesque and beautiful to be able to take on the warrior woman.

Only 2 have played it on screen in the past. 2? Really? Sure we all know Lynda Carter. The epitome of Wonder Woman to us all. And one of my first childhood fantasy girls. I wanted her to wrap me up in her golden lasso. Yeah, I thought dirty things as a kid too. Surprised? Lynda is beautiful, tall, strong and articulate. And mama could fill out that uniform! But, she was not the first woman to play the role.

In 1974, Cathy Lee Crosby played the Amazonian Princess in a TV movie. A crappy TV movie. And she had the worst costume ever! Look at that over there! Crappity crap crap! Now, look back up at Ms. Carter. The hotness! Ya feel me?

Here's a teaser poster for the flick by Adam Hughes. Pretty cool, eh? Who is my ideal actress to play the role? That's tough. Charisma Carpenter, also formerly of BUFFY/ANGEL, might be a good pick. Still relatively unknown. I've heard many a well known, young actress name being mentioned like Jessica Biel and Mischa Barton. Big fat "NO!" on both of those. I've even heard ridiculous ones like Julia Roberts. Hell, let Sean Young come out of the wood works while you're at it. Remember how she dressed up like "Cat Woman" on every talk show when she was trying to win the role in BATMAN RETURNS?

Another name thrown around, Monica Bellucci. This actually makes a lot of sense to me. Besides being one of the most beautiful women in the world, she is a terrific actress. She's very famous in Europe and acts in 3 or 4 languages. You probably only know her from THE MATRIX sequels. In my opinion, the only thing holding her back is her age. Yes, she has an accent. But, that would be logical to me. Who knows what they would sound like on Wonder Woman's mythical, hidden island of Amazons? Probably not English speakers. So, why couldn't she have an accent? It would probably upset the status quo, so it's a pipe dream.

Speaking of dreams, I just may dream of all of the above in the costume. And out of it. Only wearing the bracelets. And, of course, the golden lasso.

                                  

I leave you with my rendition of her Invisible Plane above. Pretty cool, dontcha think? I've been told I should get into art more,but I'm just too shy. For now, enjoy.

March Madness Revisited

Okay, I was wrong. Yes, I admit I'm wrong. I'm one of those rare, few people who know how to do that. Unlike many people I know. I actually was arguing with someone the other day and said, "You know....it's okay to be wrong sometimes." This person kind of laughed and actually admitted the following. "When I think I'm losing an argument, I just talk over the person until they back down." Basically saying, he knows he's wrong, but doesn't care. Pretty much confessing that he's an asshole. How can you knowingly do something like that? Wow. People suck sometimes. Some of them...ALL of the time. Anyway, back to me being wrong. Wrong about College Basketball.

This year's Men's NCAA tournament has had many an upset. Duke lost? Memphis too? And Gonzaga? What is going on? As of now, heading into the Final 4 are LSU and UCLA. Right now, UConn is facing George Mason. He's only one guy, this George, but he's the Cinderella Story of the tournament! The Giant Killer! Statistically, #1 seeds rarely lost in these situations,but it's hard to call this year! Winner of this game heads into the Final 4. The game after is #1 seed Villanova vs. Florida. I'm rooting for 'Nova. I know, I'm from Florida. But, I was a Florida State fan since I was a kid and almost went to college there. And they are bitter rivals. Not only do you root for your team in college sports, but you almost root more against the hated rival!

So, my call for champ is now Villanova. Don't let me down Wildcats! Of course, I could just go back to the other post after the tournament and change it all to look like I predicted the future. Hmmmm....that's an idea. You'll never be able to prove me wrong,bitches! I'll just keep writing and talking over you until you back down! Oh wait....then I'll be the asshole.

Go watch the game. And go 'Nova!

TV Q & A

I jacked this little questionnaire from my friend, Priscilla's site. She's got a very diverse and fun site, so check it out! As for the Q & A. Well, you have to list 6 of your favorite TV shows and answer the questions that follow. We all know I watch way too much TV, so narrowing it down was really hard. My apologies to all of the shows that didn't make it. You know who you are. Here is my list of 6 shows, in a very particular order:

And if you can't follow or make out the purty pictures, then let me spell it out for you. In this order, 1. BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER, 2. LOST, 3. VERONICA MARS, 4. THE SOPRANOS, 5. ROLLERGIRLS, and 6. BATTLESTAR GALACTICA. Now, on with the Q & A!

1. Who is your favorite character from #2 (LOST)? There are so many damn characters! Currently the fave is....Sun. Especially after that little lingerie dance from last episode.
2. Who is your least favorite character from #4 (SOPRANOS)? Once again, many characters to choose from. Gonna go with a tie here: Uncle Junior and AJ. The oldest and the youngest. 2 ends of the spectrum of dull,boring and annoying.
3. What would a crossover between #1 (BUFFY) and #5 (ROLLERGIRLS) include? The rollergirls in Texas would all have been killed and are now skating as undead zombies. Buffy would have to lace up her skates and take them on! Could she survive on their home turf? Or would Punky Bruiser and Jail Bait of the Holy Rollers Un-Holy Rollers be able to take out the slayer? I don't know. But, I'd tune in over and over again. And again.
4. Who is your favorite relationship from #6 (BSG)? Six and Sharon. It's there. In my mind! And it wouldn't matter what copies of the Cylons. Any Six and any Sharon will do. Just as long as they are together.
5. If you were to set one person from #3 (VM) and #6 (BSG) on a blind date, who would they be? Kendall Casablancas and Six. They are really similar. Both conniving and shrewd. Oh yeah, and hot. Sensing a theme here?
6. If you could meet one person from #4 (SOPRANOS) and spend the day with them, who would it be and what would you do? Meadow Soprano. 'Nuff said.
7. If you could change one thing about #2's (LOST) plot line, what would you change? Wait...there's a plot?
8. Explain a relationship between 2 people (not necessarily romantic) from #5 (ROLLERGIRLS), and why you like the relationship between them. Punky Bruiser and Jail Bait of The Holy Rollers. They are best friends. Oh yeah, and they're hot.
9. If the lead title characters in (first name in the credits) from #1 (BUFFY) and #3 (VM) were both drowning, and you could only save one, who would it be? Buffy or Veronica? That is tough. I suppose I'd go with Buffy since she's been around longer. Though, she's pretty tough and wouldn't need my help. And Veronica is smart, so I'm sure she wouldn't panic and figure a way out. I'd just like to see them wet. And in need of my help. Yeah, I said it.
10. If you could change the title characters' order in the credits in #4 (SOPRANOS), what order would you choose? I think it's okay as it is. But, I suppose you put Jamie-Lynn DiScalia (Meadow) right after James Gandolfini (Tony).
11. If you were able to add a new character, any kind of character you wanted, to the storyline for #6 (BSG), what would the character be like and what would their role be? 3 words: Deus ex Machina. I would add the Gods of Kobol. They would interact with the survivors just like in Greek myths. Oh, and they'd all be Hooters girls.
12. What happens in your favorite episode of #2 (LOST)? Too many to choose! But, the most recent one: When Sawyer conned everyone and took the guns and hid them in "The Long Con". Hells yeah!
13. If you could kill off one of the characters of #1 (BUFFY), who would it be and how would you do it? This is the easy answer,but we're all thinking it. Dawn. The annoying little sis. Well, I was never a big fan of Riley's either. One of them.
14. If you got the chance to visit the set for either #3 (VM) or #5 (ROLLERGIRLS), which would you choose? Loves me some VERONICA MARS, but I'd have to go with ROLLERGIRLS. They're real! Chicks skating, fighting, swearing and drinking! I could finally be with my girls, Punky Bruiser and Jail Bait. Lunatic too. Let's not forget Miss Conduct. They could just skate around me!
15. If you could date anyone from any of these shows, which show and which person? Oh for the love of....I have to break this down by show. BUFFY: Sarah Michelle Gellar, Charisma Carpenter, and Eliza Dushku. Mmmm....Dushku. LOST: Emilie De Raven, Evangeline Lilly, and Yunjin Kim. I told you before, I'm starting to chase the hamatchi! VERONICA MARS: Kristen Bell and Charisma Carpenter. Charisma again! THE SOPRANOS: Jamie-Lynn DiScalia, Drea DeMatteo and all of the girls at The Bada Bing Club. ROLLERGIRLS: Do I need to repeat myself? Punky Bruiser, Jail Bait, Luna and Miss Conduct. BATTLESTAR GALACTICA: Tricia Helfer, Grace Park, and Nicki Clyne. Nicki? Yeah, something about her.

There you have it. Perhaps the first of many Q & A's. Also known as "Jimmy Aquino can't think of anything original to write so he has to jack his friend's site." Yeah, I'm a thief. Lock up your valuables! Or at least your website. I'm on the prowl. And, as you can probably tell from the answers above, you should go ahead and lock up your daughters and wives and sister and moms.

Just saying.

The Godfather: The Game

The Godfather: The Game. The video game to be exact. Yes, it's true! I first heard about this title last year and was intrigued. They had some how managed to get Brando to agree to do voice over work before he died. James Caan and Robert Duvall signed on as well. That punk, Pacino, couldn't find the time. Too bad his voice is so hard to mimic. Actually, and probably so they don't get sued, his likeness nor uh..soundness does not appear in the game.

But, a bunch of the others do. And, man...sure looks like the real thing! Just check out Brando over there! Which is real and which is the game! Okay, it's not that hard to tell, but pretty impressive, no? Rest assured, all of the other characters, EXCEPT Pacino, are in there and they all look like the actors who portrayed them.

Now, I hadn't bought a new video game in quite some time. When I first got my X-Box a couple of years ago, I bought plenty and played with myself for hours! Wait...that sounded wrong. Nope.  Played with myself for hours! That's right! So, when this game came out a few days ago, I thought about it. I mean, I've seen GODFATHER I & II hundreds of times. This was an offer I couldn't refuse. (Yeah, I said it.)

Basically, you start off as a low level thug and get immersed into the story of the movie. Becoming a part of such pivotal and memorable scenes from the movie like Luca Brassi's death, the wedding, the Don's shooting, etc. Suddenly, you have a hand in the outcome! No, you can't change the outcome from the movie. At least, not as of yet. I started playing a couple of days ago and have barely stopped. I have moved up to the rank of a Corleone Family soldier! Recognize,bitches! Or, in the world of the game, Capiche? You keep playing until you become the new Don Corleone. Oh, it'll happen.

If you don't hear from me for awhile, it's not because I'm sleeping with the fishes. It's just that I went to the mattresses with this game and wont give in until I win! And remember:

Leave the gun. Take the cannoli.

Digital Love

That old saying, "It's better to have loved and lost, then never to have loved at all" is a load of hooey! I loved you from the moment we came together. And when you were so suddenly taken from me yesterday, I was inconsolable. Anger, frustration, despair, and sadness took over my whole being. For some odd reason, so did constipation. What happened to you? You have never left me before. And on last night of all nights! You know how important our Wednesdays together are! Were you upset that I was out with 3 beautiful girls and didn't get home until later? You know I always come home to you. And when I did. You weren't there.

Please, oh please....my beautiful and darling Digital cable. Please don't ever go away again! That goes for you too, cable modem for my computer! Do you know how lost I was last night? No TV shows to watch. No porn to download. And speaking of LOST....you weren't there to record it for me! Praise to Buddha that you came back today and I was able to find "ways" of getting those shows I missed last night. You're lucky. Don't make me go to satellite! Because, you know the new saying, "It's better to have loved LOST, then to never have watched LOST at all" is also a load of hooey!

Just a friendly word of advice, my love. I am leaving soon,but promise to return later tonight. I expect you here, you ungrateful bitch! Sorry, I didn't mean that. You know I love you. Be well. Be safe. And be on and working.

Until tonight, I remotely turn you to off.

*Click*

CNI: Episode 27-All Ages Comics

Comic News Insider: Episode 27 will be up and ready by 9 a.m. Our special All-ages comic book episode. Where we discuss comic books that are appropriate for kids of all ages! As we discuss, so many of today's comic books are not for children. Even books like BATMAN, SUPERMAN, SPIDER-MAN and THE FANTASTIC 4 are not kid worthy. Go ahead. Pick one up. You'll see a little bit of the ultra violence, adult themes and language. Now, as an adult, I don't mind this at all. But, kids? I don't know if I'd let my kids read some of these. Well, that is...if I knew where my kids were. If you have any information, please contact me.

Joe and I interview special guest, Chris Eliopoulos, creator of kid friendly book FRANKLIN RICHARDS: SON OF A GENIUS. He both writes and draws the misadventures of the son of Reed Richards, A.K.A. Mr. Fantastic of the Fantastic 4. Great interview and a really nice guy! We both wanted to continue the conversation and have a longer interview,but we had time constraints. Curse you, Father Time! And what's with it being Father? Is there no Mother Time? Maybe he's married to Mother Nature. Brother of Uncle Sam. It's one big happy family!

We also do a Q & A with 8 year old, Sam, of THE SG SHOW podcast. "Eight-year-old Sam and his dad, Steve, talk about books, fun things for families to do together, and, well, life... really." We sent him the comic and he read it and reviewed it. And, he professionally and precisely answered our questions! He's a cool little dude! You'll love his review!

And we do a little listener feedback and discuss one of our many emails/comments that we got about our last show. We also had a partially correct entry into the "Guess Jimmy's Ethnicity" contest. He was half right, so he's getting a small prize. So, the contest is still on, peoples! Tune in, spread the word and enjoy!

Julia Louise-Dreyfus Breaks Out of Prison!

Once again, I have cleverly fooled you with the title of this post! No, Julia Louis-Dreyfus wasn't in jail. At least, not to my knowledge. I bet she could have formulated a massive break out if she wanted. Just like when she became a break out star during her days on SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE. I always dug her back then. And, of course, her stint on SEINFELD was legendary. That "Seinfeld curse" was created after all 3 supporting characters tried new sitcoms and they all failed. So, here she is again. Going at it. And the result? Well, looks like we have a bonafide winner here! Julia is charming and funny and crazy and neurotic and endearing and beautiful as a single mom trying to find new love. Only 2 episodes in, but the ratings for THE NEW ADVENTURES OF OLD CHRISTINE are quite good and I'm digging it. Give it a shot. You might fall back in love with her. I never fell out of love with her. I'm loyal like that. Like a good dog. Yet, I tend to stray. Like a stray dog. And I like to bite. Uh.....

Changing gears here,but keeping with the break out theme. PRISON BREAK started back up after being put on hiatus for about 6 months due to The World Series and American Idol and whatnot. That FOX network. Full of smart guys. Well, full of something. This gripping show came back with a bang and keeps you on the edge of your seat throughout the episode. Or in my case, the edge of my floor. I sold all of my furniture for a new TV. I haven't eaten or slept in weeks. But, that TV is some good stuff! Did anyone else find it funny that the very first commercial aired in the first commercial break was that weird Volkwagen one with the guy in the German accent? You know, the one starring Peter Stormare. He played the imprisoned mob boss who had his throat slashed at the end of the last half of the first season. Irony? I don't think so. He'll be back. They never said he was dead! Anyway, FOX is promising new weekly episodes through May. Let's see if they keep to their promise. Unless some new reality show comes along that would pre-empt it, like American Assholes. Actually, that could be a hit show! Just following a couple of assholes around with a camera. I know quite a few. I'm writing my proposal now. DON'T STEAL MY IDEA!

It's going along with my other new reality show idea, THE REALLY SIMPLE LIFE. That's where the cameras follow around some simple, socially inept folk. Stick 'em in a room together and watch the fun!

Simple Person 1: "Hey, do you watch Star Trek?"

Simple Person 2: "Yeah! I love it."

Simple Person 1: "Cool."

Simple Person 2: "Cool."

And then they sit there silent for hours. Whaddya think? Anybody want to back this thing? If so, you know how to reach me. Until then, check these shows out. And while you're at it, check my podcast out. Info in the previous post. Shameless self plug, I know.  Well, this is my blog after all! DO IT!