I went down to China Town the other day in search of a jacket. You know, the kung fu jackets that they wear in the kung fu movies! Yes, I'm shooting a kung fu porn. Anyway, for some reason, I couldn't find one. It's frickin' China Town for Buddha's sake! I finally came across one store with kind of what I was looking for. Except that the top came with pants. Well, I didn't want the pants! And, no...I wasn't going to just wear the jacket and nothing else, ya filthy minded buggers! $30 for both. Well, I just want the top. The old Chinese woman balks,but as I start to walk away, she says "$25" for the top. I think about it. Hmmmm....
Nope. I counter with $20. She balks at this as if I just insulted the House of her Father. She says, "Okay, $22. Good price." I think again. Nope! I stick to my guns at $20. She replies, "$22 good price for you. No more lower."
I think some more. Yes, my brain started hurting. I was starting to think I didn't want it. More hmmmm...ing. I decide against it and start to walk out. She shouts, "OK! $20! GOOD PRICE! $20!" I stop in my tracks. Look back.
And walk out.
Yeah, that's how I roll, bitches. Of course, now I have The Triad looking out for me. That's why I'm heading to San Francisco tomorrow. Hopefully, word won't have gotten out to their China Town. If I run into the same woman, I'm in trouble. "$20 NO GOOD FOR YOU!" And then we get in a Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon type fight.
Burn some incense for me. Pray to Buddha. I'm packing my nunchakus and throwing stars,but my Saturday morning Kung Fu Theater training is all I have.
If only I could walk on trees...
Don't worry, I called off the hit on ya. Funny, the jacket in that old lady's hand looks like some kind of melon. Well, I don't know the difference between melons and jackets so don't mind me. All's cool.
Posted by: schen | September 18, 2006 at 09:22 PM
Nothing like having the Triad after you while in San Fran. Yep. Ain't life grand?
Just be ready to use your Aq-Fu at all times, except if the ladies got you pinned. And never forget what Jack Burton once said "It's all in the reflexes, bot pors!"
Posted by: FireflyChef | September 18, 2006 at 11:47 PM
Well, if fighting does ensue between you and a team of Kung Fu Hustle-type old ladies, I'd sell tickets, and the money could help cover your medical bills. I'm only thinking about your happiness, Jimmy. XD
Posted by: Priscilla | September 19, 2006 at 12:04 AM
I've got a photo of you wearing a hat that I'll be posting in a day or two.
Posted by: mike. | September 19, 2006 at 10:13 AM