I don't ask much as a bartender. Just know what you want. Know your drink. If it's wine or beer and you have a question, ask it! I'll gladly educate. Don't come in asking, "What's your specialty?" I've been bartending off and on for 15 years. EVERYTHING is my specialty. If you know what you like to drink, then tell me. If you want something left out or added, then tell me. Pretty simple. For example. If I wanted a bourbon and coke with a lemon slice. I'll ask for it. I wont order a bourbon and coke and expect a lemon slice. Where am I going with all of this? Well, right here, bitches! Actually, right below. Read on.
A group comes in the bar. One guy orders. "I'll take a Manhattan. With Johnny Walker Red." Okay, first off, let me define it for you. A Manhattan is rye whiskey or bourbon, sweet vermouth and bitters. Johnny Walker Red, while a whiskey, is specifically a scotch whiskey. Therefore, it's not called a Manhattan. It's called a Rob Roy. Rob Roy is scotch whiskey, sweet vermouth and bitters. Simple mistake. No big deal. I ask if he wants it up or on the rocks. He wants it up with 3 cherries. And shaken hard. Okay, normally Manhattan's and Roby Roy's are to be stirred. No big deal. He wants it extra cold. All good. I shake the shit up and serve it to him.
A few minutes later, he says to me. "Um...I think there's too much sweet vermouth in here." Now, I've made that drink a million times. I told him I didn't put much in. As per usual. As per the classic recipe. Still, I told him I'd put more scotch in if he wanted. I poured some out, added scotch and shook again. He took the drink.
A few minutes later, he says to me. "Um...can I get some ice cubes." I give them to him and he puts them in the drink. Okay...ewwww. But, his drink.
A few minutes later, his friend says to me. "He's not really happy with his drink." He pretends like it didn't bother him . "No, it's fine." I ask him what he would like. Should I make it again? I was being as accomodating as I could. Though he was being annoying. He says, "I don't know if it's too much sweet vermouth or something." I explain to him. "Maybe you're not used to the bitters." He seemed surprised which led me to believe I was right. I went on to explain how many bartenders have gotten in the bad habit of not putting bitters in Manhattan's and Rob Roy's. How it is part of the recipe. He suddenly acts like he knows. "Oh, no. It's not the bitters." Then he says something which really pissed me off.
"It's my fault. I should have been watching you make it." WHAT THE FUCK? Like I need you to hold my hand. Dick. I nicely explain that I've been bartending for 15 years and know how to make a drink. I suggest that he just likes his drinks a certain way and should be more specific in the future. I wanted to say, "Listen asshole. I've been bartending longer than you even had a thought. Next time, tell me what you want and don't be a dick about it." But, I didn't. I was nice.
And, he was one of the many Broadway actors in the neighborhood. My former life. I know these people. Many work their butts off to get where they are. Others, are lucky and spoiled. Never worked a day in their life. Talented and spoiled. Horrible combination. I'd love to go see him in his show, whatever it is, and stop him mid-solo. "You know...I'd prefer if you sang that falsetto. And your G sounded a bit sharp. But, hey, my fault. I should have left notes for you before you went on."
Still, I remade the cocktail. He drank it. Nothing else happened. Well, besides me punching him in the junk.
And, you'd think he'd tip extra for being such a dick. Nope.
Bottom line, if you drink a drink often.....know what you want.
Or risk a junk punch.
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